I've spent a lot of time thinking about whether or not to post this but have come to the conclusion that its inevitably going to come out at some point, so I might as well get it over with now. I got absolutely terrible news on Monday. I lost my job at the design firm. Yup. Just like that. Its over. After putting in 2 years there and having JUST finished/mailed my course on Friday, by Monday, it all came to a crashing halt. I'm still in total shock and feel very confused as to how this could have happened, but having 2 days under my belt now to think about it, I'm slowly realizing that this really isn't a terrible nightmare, its actually my reality. Its kind of a long story and I won't go into all the details as its still pretty hard to even have to admit but to sum it up, she found someone more qualified and figured that the company needed to move in that direction. I'm trusting that God has something far greater in store for me, though its pretty hard to see what that could possibly be right now. This is what I have always wanted to do. My whole life. Since I was a little kid, I always knew I wanted to be in design. So to have worked SO hard to finish my correspondence and after thinking I would just stay with the firm until Jon and I decided to have kids, I feel totally blind-sided and utterly confused that this has happened so suddenly and without any real warning. So... with that, I would truly appreciate your prayers. I have some big decisions to make that I had hoped I would never have to make and its a little daunting to say the very least.
I do know God is in control of this. Even though I'm totally devastated, I have felt His peace in the fact that He knew this would happen, even before he "knit me together in my mother's womb." (Psalm 139:13) This isn't too big for Him to handle and I am trusting Him with my future. I also know that it was no coincidence that I opened my Bible to these words, when I got home on Monday after hearing the awful news. And amidst my tears and confusion, He touched my heart with peace through these words,
"My child, listen to me and treasure my instructions. Tune your ears to wisdom, and concentrate on understanding. Cry out for insight and understanding. Search for them as you would for lost money or hidden treasure. Then you will understand what it means to fear the Lord, and you will gain knowledge of God. For the Lord grants wisdom! From his mouth come knowledge and understanding. He grants a treasure of good sense to the godly. He is their shield, protecting those who walk with integrity. He guards the paths of justice and protects those who are faithful to him." - Proverbs 2:1-8 -
Guess this New Year is going to be even more interesting than I had originally thought.