6 week update...

Callie is 6 weeks old today... how can that be!?! We've been told countless times, "enjoy every minute with them because they grow up SO quickly!" And though I've smiled and nodded at these cliche comments, it is actually hitting me now, just how true that statement is. She literally changes every single day and when I think back to the day she was born, the memories are already becoming a bit hazy. (Which, in the way of labour/delivery, I would say is a good thing ;))
The biggest highlight over the last few weeks has been Callie's constant smiling. She is such a content & happy baby and has started to smile for just about anyone that will try to get a grin out of her. I've tried really hard to get it on camera and finally had some success today. I also managed to catch a quick one on video too. If you watch the clip below, you'll see her face light up when I scan back to her after showing you her "horsie." We have some stuffed animal puppets up on the shelves above her change table and she goes crazy over this particular horse. Just yesterday, she was entertained by him for over 20 minutes. Her legs kick in excitement and she smiles and cooes at him every time we put her on the table.

(** Sorry, but blogger won't let me upload the video right now... I'll add it as soon as I can.)

The last time we were at the doctor (which was just over a week & 1/2 ago), she was 9 lbs. 5 oz. and with the way she feeds, I'm sure she's pretty close to 10 lbs. by now :) They didn't measure her but the time before that, she was in the 90th percentile for height and she has continued to grow a lot in length over the last few weeks.
As for sleeping, I honestly couldn't ask for a better baby. She only wakes once in the night to feed, and often even sleeps right through. Last week, she slept from 10:30pm- 6:30am. And just last night, I put her down at around 8:30pm and she slept until 3:00am. She ate, was back into bed by 3:20am and didn't wake again until 7:00am. I feel so blessed! I know that things can change quickly but I'm definitely getting a lot more rest than I thought I would and am taking full advantage of it while I can.
I've felt especially blessed by Callie's easy-going & sweet nature because the last few weeks have been quite rough for me. Nursing was a challenge right from the beginning and after finally getting her to latch without the help of a "shield" (at around the 3 week mark), the pain of it quickly became UNBEARABLE. I knew that something was wrong and soon discovered, with the help of my doctor & a nurse at the health unit, that I had a bad case of thrush. So, they gave me a prescription cream to apply and recommended that in order for me to heal a bit, I should pump for a weekend and just bottle feed her. So I did that and hated every minute of it. It was SO time-consuming because I had to sterilize everything, every single time I used it due to the thrush infection. Thankfully, she took a bottle like a champ!
But then, after finally getting her back to breastfeeding early that week, by Friday I had developed mastitis as well (on our anniversary of all things). Fortunately, I caught the mastitis early enough and they got me on antibiotics before I got too sick. On top of all of this, I re-tore a bit and have been waiting for that to heal up. My doctor doesn't think it needs to be re-stitched just yet and is hoping it will heal on its own. But I've now had an open wound for the last 3 weeks and am growing frustrated with the fact that its summer time, and I probably won't be able to swim at all, due to the risk of infection. Needless to say, its been a rough few weeks and I'm continuing to pray for healing and patience for it to happen. If you think of it, I'd totally appreciate your prayers too.
On a completely different subject, Jon and I are getting super excited for this weekend to arrive. We leave for holidays on Saturday and are going to be spending an entire week (Saturday to the following Saturday) at a lake up north. We haven't had a "true holiday" like this in a long time. Jon's Great-Aunt & Uncle own a cabin and are graciously letting us use it for the week. We're SO looking forward to having some time, just the 3 of us, and spending some time away from the hustle and bustle of life. Especially after the crazy month we've had. I'll be sure to post pictures of our little get-away when we get back.

4 years...

Today is our 4th anniversary. I'm unbelievably thankful for the years that God has given Jon and I together and can't imagine life with anyone else.  Its a pretty incredible gift to be married to your very best friend.

4 years ago today, we stood under a big white tent and shared our vows of commitment to each other.  We wrote our own vows and they mean as much to me today as they did back then...

"We've already been through a lot together, and I believe that God has been preparing us for this moment for our future. Jon, I love you so much and there is nothing more comforting and assuring than knowing I am going to be spending the rest of my life by your side. You are a gift from God and every time I look at you I fall in love all over again. You inspire me with your calm spirit and genuine care for others. Just being with you makes me a better me. I want to spend the rest of my life showing you in both word and action the deep love and respect I have for you. You are my best friend and I promise to encourage you in the hard times, laugh with you in the good times, and trust God with you in the times when we are simply unsure. And when life feels like too much, I pray that we will find solace and comfort in the simplicity of each other's embrace. Jon, I promise to be faithful to you and you alone, and may my actions be a testimony to the unending love I have for you. I believe that two are better than one and I pray that we will grow together in one heart and mind. I am so thankful for you and the man that God has made you to be. I vow to treat each morning as a new day to love you, the gift I have been given. This is my promise to you."

"We've already been through a lot together, and I believe that God has been preparing us for this moment for our future. Bonnie, you are so incredibly gorgeous and talented, your humorous personality, your fun laugh and your bright smile draw people to you like I have never seen before. A look from your soft brown eyes can melt my heart to nothing. I find contentment in looking at your beauty. You encourage me, comfort me, make me laugh and affirm me at all the right times. There is no other person I would rather have as a companion. Today I vow to you that I will always love you. I vow that my love will not stop at an emotion, but will extend into the covenant that I make with you today. I will show my love in my attitude, my actions, my heart, and in my character. I promise to follow Phillipians 2:3-4 and to put your needs ahead of mine. I promise to lead with a Christ-like attitude and I promise to not allow unimportant details to overtake the importance of our relationship. I will love you by encouraging you, making quality time for you and by giving you those timely hugs. I vow to treat each morning as a new day to love you, the gift I have been given. This is my promise to you."

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Happy Anniversary honey.  I love you.

Oh my...

We finally got some cooler weather yesterday, so I decided to take Callie for a nice long walk in order to get her to sleep for her last afternoon nap. I took these pictures just before we left and personally think that she looks ridiculously cute! :) Her expression is priceless and the ears just make the picure...

Sleeping through the heat...

We've been having an extreme heat wave this week and there's no sign of relief coming any time soon.  With the humidex, its supposed to feel like +45 by Friday.  I'm not usually one to complain about the heat... in fact, I usually welcome it with open arms.  But with a newborn, and no air-conditioning, this is feeling like way too much.  Thankfully, Callie has still been sleeping well despite the heat.  In fact, other than eat, that's about all she does.  Then again, I guess that's normal for a 4 week old :)  Anyway... here are a few pictures from the last week or so.

Callie with "Auntie" Ginny on my birthday...

Callie's famous "Garfield" sleeping position...

Dozing on a warm summer evening...

Enjoying Erich & Naomi's pool on a HOT day...

"Smile for the camera, Calvin..."

Sleeping in the shade while everyone else enjoys the pool...

"I think I'll just watch from here..." :)

Doing what I do best...

Celebrations...

Its hard to believe that today marks 25 years of life for me, and 3 weeks for Callie.  Time is just flying by!  Callie gave me the best birthday gift too.  She pretty much slept through the night last night (only waking for a quick 15 min. feed at 4:00am) and slept in til 7:30am!  Then she fed again and went back down at 8am and slept til 10:30am, allowing me another 2 hours of sleep.  Such a wonderful way to start my birthday!!  

I have to say that Callie's first 3 weeks of life have been anything but "normal" for a newborn.  Things have been good but ridiculously busy (and exhausting!) including a visit from my brother & sister-in-law, Craig & Jen; the wedding (and all the festivities leading up to it) of Jon's oldest sister and now brother-in-law, Susanne & Juergen; trying to get in time with family & friends; and also the wedding of Jon's closest childhood friend and his new bride, Tyler & Rae.  All of this, on top of being new at motherhood, breastfeeding, and having significant healing to do myself... life has felt a little hairy at times.  But we've made it through the worst of the busyness and are looking forward to a slightly lighter schedule in the next few weeks.  

Anyway... thought I'd share a few photos from the last few weeks worth of celebrations.

   

Saying goodbye to Auntie Jen & Uncle Craig... 

(which was not a celebration by the way... anything but...)

Watching Auntie Susie & Uncle Juergen "tie the knot"...

Family pictures at the park...

All dolled up...

Auntie Susie made the most STUNNING bride...

More wedding bliss... Rae & Tyler...

Saturday morning snuggles with Daddy...

Trying to recover from all the busyness & chaos...

And to all of you who are dying to have Callie time, please bear with us as we can only stretch ourselves in so many directions.  We'll do our best to share the wealth of cuteness as soon as we can.  Just need some time to settle after these first few crazy weeks.

Now we're off to enjoy a nice birthday meal with our fantastic friends, Ginny & Steve.  Talk to you soon...  

The labour scoop...

Callie is asleep in the Snugli right now, so I might as well take the chance to post while I can.  Some of you have been wanting to hear all about my labour/delivery so I'll give you as best a description as possible, without giving too many gory details :)

I guess it all started on Sunday night (June 28).  I was up all night, with significantly stronger contractions than I had ever had, and they were coming every 3-4 min., lasting 60-75 seconds long.  I kept debating whether to wake Jon to head into the hospital, but kept worrying that we would just get there and be sent away with news that I still wasn't dilated.  So after a very sleepless night (I only got about 2 hours of actual sleep), things died off in the early hours of the morning.  We got up bright and early to call the hospital for confirmation of induction and were told to be there at 7:30am.  So we packed everything up and headed to the hospital.  After monitoring the baby for an hour and waiting for my doctor to arrive, they finally gave me the induction gel at about 9am.  Then they sent us home and said to come back if anything happened, or if there was no effect, then to come back just after 2pm so they could gel me again.  

So we drove home, ate some lunch and I tried desperately to get a bit of sleep, in preparation for pending labour.  2:00pm came and nothing had happened so we went back to the hospital for round #2 of the gel.  After inducing me the second time (at around 3pm), they again, sent us home and said to come back at 8pm for round #3 OR if I went into labour in the meanwhile.  We left the hospital, picked up some supper and while we were driving home, the contractions started up.  And they were strong!  By the time we got home, things were definitely progressing and the contractions were coming every 2-4 min., lasting over a minute each time.  And more importantly, they were getting more and more unbearable.  I tried to eat as much as I could but by 5:00pm, I was already in HARD labour.  Jon kept asking if we should go to the hospital but after being told ALL DAY, that I was still only 1cm dilated, I wanted to be able to labour at home as long as possible.  

Well... that plan went out the window fairly quickly, as the contractions were just too much to handle by 6pm.  

We arrived back at the hospital by 6:15pm and were promptly admitted.  Much to my dismay, they found that I was still only about 1-2cm dilated.  So I spent the next few hours switching back and forth between the hot shower, and rocking my hips back and forth, hunched over my bed.  By 10:30pm (and feeling utterly EXHAUSTED by this point), my doctor informed me that they were going to have to do an epidural because my body just wasn't progressing (I was still only 1-2cm) and things needed to get moving.  I had really, REALLY wanted to avoid an epidural, but by that stage, I was desperate for some relief and knew that my doctor knew what was best for me.  

So by about 11pm, the epidural was in and, my oh my... what sweet, sweet relief!  I know some of you are probably "anti-epidural" but from my experience, EVERYONE should get one :)  It was incredible!  I was even able to sleep a bit over the next hours as the pain was virtually gone.  Once the epidural had been given, I started to progress really quickly.  I went from 1cm to 4, in an hour, and then the last 6cm only took another 2-3 hours.  By 3:00am, it was time to push.  

The next sucky part of the labour was that Callie didn't seem to want to come out with the coaxing of my pushing alone, and they had to use the vacuum.  The resident was doing the delivery with my doctor standing by, and the vacuum kept popping off when he would start to pull.  I found this TERRIBLY disconcerting because every time it popped off, I thought that her head had finally come out, and was totally demoralized when they informed me that it was just the vacuum coming loose.  Finally my doctor took over and by 3:55am, Callie was in my arms.

  

Words cannot describe what the moment felt like.  I've heard a lot of people say that its like an 'out-of-body-experience' and I would completely agree.  I wanted so desperately to soak in the moment but it was just so surreal.  I felt like I was watching someone else's experience, rather than experiencing it myself.  

They laid her on my chest right away and let her stay there for a good 15 min. or so while they assessed my injuries.  I was then informed that I had 3rd & 4th degree tearing (which I did in fact feel-- the epidural isn't able to numb all the outer tissue so I still felt the whole delivery) and that they were going to have to bring in the obstetrician to repair the damage, as my doctor just didn't feel he would do a sufficient job.  Thankfully, I was very focused on Callie as they sewed me up, and I tried to keep my eyes fixed on her as they cleaned her & weighed her.  

So there you have it.  The full scoop on my labour & delivery (well... pretty much :)).  I saw my doctor last week and he's very happy with Callie's growth & progress and was pleased to see that my healing was going well too.  Unfortunately though, he figures I still have another 6-8 weeks of recovery before I will be "100%" again.  But I can say in total honesty, that each day gets a little bit easier and I'm feeling WAY better this week, than even last.  So I feel fairly optimistic that things will feel normal again someday :)

And as for life with Callie, things are going great!  She's such a joy and is truly an exceptionally good baby.  She slept through the night at 12 days old, and only gets up 1-2 times a night to feed now.  I really can't complain.  When she's awake, she's very alert and has even given us a few big smiles (even though we know they're probably just due to passing gas :)).  Life just feels so right with her around and its hard to even remember life before her.  We are loving our Callie-bear :)

Curious??

I know many of you are probably dying to hear about Callie's birth story and get an update on how things are going here at the Esau household.  I promise to get around to it someday soon but for now, I've designated this week to spending as much time getting to know my little girl as I can, and sleeping as often as she does :)  Plus, Jon's sister, Susanne, is getting married on Saturday so the next few days are packed full of wedding stuff.  

So hang in there... I will be updating soon.  And just for the record, things are going well.  Each day gets a little better (ie: my healing, Callie's feeding, etc.) and we're loving life as parents!  Its hard to even remember the days before Callie arrived.  Life just feels right with her here.

Be back soon!  Here are a few pictures to tide you over until then... :)

Introducing...

Callie Lauryn Esau

Born June 30, 2009

@ 3:55am

8 lbs. 3 0z.

21 inches.

... and simply perfect...

... We're SO in love...

(Many, many more pictures to come...)